Saturday, June 23, 2012

I Must be Kinkier then Normal.

I was really hoping that all of this 50 Shades of Grey talk would go away. Turns out if you want to sell books to women you tell them that it's super naughty and filled with lots of sex. Why didn't the romance novels think of that? Oh, that's right, because those still pretend to have a story, unlike 50 Shades.

Now some people might not think that is fair to say, and maybe that's true, however, I challenge them to go through the books and find out how much story there is compared to how much sex there is. Come back and tell me what you find. I bet after book one, once you've really looked at it, you'll discover that there is very little story and a lot of build up to describing sex. This really shouldn't shock me considering that there were 4 Twilight books that built up to no drama and no fighting, and these books apparently started as Twilight fan fiction.

I have no problems with marketing fan fiction, I have no problems with smut. In fact some of the best smut I have ever read has been fan fiction, and it have been dirty. Lots of it was written by middle age women, and let me tell you, wanna good sex scene written? Talk to a woman in her 30's and 40's. Awesome. Anyway, the problem I did have with 50 Shades, other than the fact that it has no real plot, was being told that it offered BDSM sex. It doesn't. It hints at it, but I am pretty sure that I have read way dirtier Star Trek smut, and it's STAR TREK (ever see a sex scene on Star Trek? Wasn't it awkward? yeah...not in fan fiction it isn't. At least not if you know where to find the good stuff).

To me, and in my research, there should at least be some ropes. At the very least. The spanking is good, so I give kudos for that, and the hand cuffs that were used once was also good. Still, everything for me was a little too tame. Everything that was described in the "contract" (if you haven't read 50 Shades: Christian tries to get Anna into a sexual contract where she has to do everything he says), as things that they wouldn't do, were things that I equate with BDSM. The weird thing is, he has the room! He has all the toys! Just you never really get to see (or rather read), them used. False advertising.

For me, due to the extreme amount that the sex was placed over the story of the book, I got bored. I like reading erotica as much as the next person, but I like it varied and I like it interesting. This missed the mark for me. I am glad to hear though, that it's helping women every where talk about sex openly. Maybe that's the most important part.

Still wouldn't hurt to have a little breath play...just sayin.

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